Episode Transcript

This transcript was AI generated.

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00:00:04:13 - 00:00:14:15

Alison

As a mother centered coach. I create wellbeing care experiences to transform the motherhood experience and share the transformative wisdom of matrescence.

00:00:14:22 - 00:00:41:14

Lucy

Welcome to today's episode of Mondays in the podcast, where we're exploring the inspiring stories of working mums building businesses, whether they're just starting out or still considering taking the leap. These women are showing us how to balance family, passion and entrepreneurship, all while making a meaningful impact. I am so thrilled to have Alison Lafferty with me today as our guest.

Alison had over 20 years experience in the corporate world, and then found a calling to pivot her focus and create a positive impact by supporting mothers. She's a certified mama rising motherhood and matrescence coach. Mum of two. And she's passionate about driving a cultural change in how we empower mums to achieve work life harmony. One of our favourite words here at Mums and Co. Alison's business offers seasonal wellbeing boxes filled with really beautiful local products and guided rituals to help mums thrive throughout motherhood.

Her journey began as a working mum, constantly balancing the demands of mothering and work, and she realised the universal in a split women feel as they transition between motherhood well before motherhood and motherhood. And she really wanted to support other women through this shift. Instead of creating another product focused on babies, Alison combined her certification with conscious local products and self-care practices to support women.

She introduces them to the healing inside of Matrescence, recognizing the birth of the mother and the physical and psychological shift that we have in our identities.

Really excited to welcome you, Alison, to my ambition. Thank you so much for joining us today.

00:02:06:18 - 00:02:08:20

Alison

Thank you. Lucy. I'm so pleased to be here.

00:02:08:22 - 00:02:10:06

Lucy

I'm excited about diving in what Mental Lessons is as well, a bit later, but in a nutshell, if you were asked which were asking what? Who does your business help? Who and how?

00:02:21:09 - 00:02:45:02

Alison

The primary audience of my business are mothers. Specifically the mothers, who are in the early formative years of mothering. They've just sort of transitioned into this new phase of life where they're kind of reconciling between this previous identity and this new identity as a mother. But equally, what I'm also trying to do is advocate for maternal wellbeing, really throughout the whole season of motherhood.

So whether or not you're going into this stage of mothering of a teenager or you've got an you're an empty nester, it's really about acknowledging all the different transitions within motherhood, and supporting women where they are at those particular seasons.

00:03:00:13 - 00:03:01:16

Lucy

So good. Alison, can you give us a like a brief definition of matrescencees for people who might not know what it is?

00:03:07:18 - 00:03:36:12

Alison

Yeah. So matrescence is the transition into and throughout motherhood. It was actually coined by an anthropologist, Anna Rafael, and she described it as this profound and very, often challenging process of a woman's transition into motherhood that encompasses physical, emotional, psychological and social shifts. And she also, made the recommendation that we start thinking about when a baby is born.

So as a mother, and I think that it's really powerful because you can suddenly see that you've never had the experience of being a mother before. That's why it is overwhelming. You never had those emotions. And so I think this definition really allows all those emotions. And then further along in, the 80s, Doctor Arlie Athon, she likened retreats to adolescence, which is a period of transition from child to adult that really affects every aspect of life, which is so similar to Matrescence, which is this period of transition from maiden to mother, and that also affects every aspect of life.

00:04:18:07 - 00:04:19:05

Lucy

Absolutely. like, we're not given a rule book. People don't tell us really what it's like, and that's not because they don't want to be helpful or supportive. It's genuinely because everybody's experience is different. And particularly our transition period is different for everyone, depending on your birth, depending on what you did before. Can you tell us a little bit about the mid presence training you did and what appealed to you about doing it and what it's helped you with, particularly in, I suppose, view of the business that you've built?

00:04:50:13 - 00:05:18:12

Alison

Yeah, absolutely. So, in 2022, I joined Amy Telecom as, training around Matrescence. And so I really wanted to do a certification, understanding the whole, motherhood wellbeing support model. And I loved what Amy was advocating for in terms of understanding the pillars of Matrescence, the various different aspects of supporting, the spiritual, the emotional, the physical needs of a mother. And, what I also liked about the mama rising program, which is, actually the first international certified course in Matrescence, is that it would give me a framework, a playbook to be able to drive a change around how we support mothers, specifically mothers who are looking to understand themselves better and who are sort of reconciling between this new identity of being a mum. And also the previous sort of, frame of mind that she's had before becoming a mother.

00:05:50:14 - 00:05:54:20

Lucy

So powerful. And how long was that course that you did with Amy?

00:05:55:14 - 00:06:12:09

Alison

It was a five month certification. And as part of that, we were broken into different cohorts who were able to do some team work, practice coaching. And, it was powerful because at the time, I really was my first client myself. You know, to immediately take the principles and teachings and apply it to myself. I think we help ourselves first when we get called to this program and this sort of, calling around supporting mothers. We can help ourselves to go through the program ourselves and then be able to then share the knowledge and advocate for the change.

00:06:33:04 - 00:06:42:13

Lucy

Love that. And when you did the course, had you already created the concept for For the Love of Mum boxes, or was that afterwards?

00:06:42:21 - 00:07:06:00

Alison

I had, when I had my second child, my son, I remember my sisters gifted me a box, of products, and it came at a time of the week where I was really feeling rundown, overwhelmed, and just the feeling I felt when I opened this box. And there was nothing in there for anybody but me, and it made me feel sane. It made me feel supported. I was just inspired. A light bulb went off really, where it's like this feeling. How do I recreate this feeling for other mothers? So I think I put a some notes down in an app on my phone and a notes app, and I just went back to, you know, the usual days of maternity leave and then went back to the workforce. And that's kind of, you know, just the beginning of it. But, as you mentioned before, I was in corporate for 20 years, and, I got made redundant in 2022. I didn't expect to be made redundant, but, you know, you never really ask. And I found myself really, questioning where I was in my, in my life at this point, I had a new identity as a mother, and I felt I was trying to shoehorn, basically this new person into this old career. Ambitious person that I used to be. And this wasn't working. The redundancy gave me the opportunity to really think through. Am I chasing a dream that no longer serves me? And I think that's when I realised it wasn't serving me anymore this previous dream. And, I had my call with H.R. And after I got off the call with H.R. I looked at my phone and there was an invitation to join Amy's, Mama Rising program. It was a literal one door closing, another one opening, and I felt almost like it was the permission I needed to go and follow this calling to support mothers. To really understand more about what is this framework of matrescence and to be able to go back to that idea that I had around supporting mums with that gift box concept, and maybe finding a way to compile and bring together the knowledge of matrescence into the knowledge of motherhood wellbeing with the feeling of providing physical products that can help mums truly help have this more holistic care experience.

00:09:11:12 - 00:09:30:09

Lucy

Absolutely love it. So what you've described there is a almost instantaneous that might be a bit a bit of a to be word mindset shift really from one stage of your life where one stage of your working life to the next stage of your working life. And I don't think we talk enough about that mindset shift that really has to happen, as you say, to give yourself that permission to step into this next part. So obviously, you have this really tremendously inspiring experience doing that course with Amy. Is there anything that you would recommend a woman who's maybe not done that course, but is in that point where you were, whether they're facing a redundancy or they're just really not that happy or fulfilled in the work that they're doing and thinking about a business. Is there something that you learnt in that course or something that you know now, in retrospect, that might have helped you, that could help them in that, in that mindset area?

00:10:13:14 - 00:10:41:11

Alison

I think one of the principles of matrescence is to acknowledge that starting with being self compassionate to yourself, to say it's okay that you know motherhood is not easy all the time. There's going to be times where you find it difficult and there's big emotions and that's totally normal. I think just normalising the motherhood experience, first of all, and accepting that there's not going to be rosy, bright days all the time. And the other thing I think that was really helpful for me was just listening to different, women who've gone through and sort of done the training. And I remember Alexander Sachs, did an amazing TedTalk on matrescence. It's got many, many views. I would recommend if anybody's really curious about learning about Morrison's, her book, hers or her TEDx talk was, was really interesting. And it will give a great sort of perspective on why matrescence is now becoming a little bit more mainstream. There's definitely much more stronger movement over the last five years. There just recently was a matrescence festival in Melbourne,

00:11:20:19 - 00:11:21:09

Lucy

Wow.

00:11:21:16 - 00:11:27:15

Alison

That Amy and I was part of, and it was led by some other women who were driving this awareness. So there is a lot more understanding around matrescence.

00:11:31:08 - 00:11:56:20

Lucy

Absolutely. Thank you for sharing that. And it's like, what's interesting to me about that? I mean, obviously that's incredibly powerful transition. But most of the women in our community who, have gone through that or are going through that are also then adding a business into the mix. So obviously you did that after the birth of your second child and realizing yourself that it was it was time for a shift. How did you take that beautiful idea you had of the box? And you mentioned writing it down in your notes at, just after having the baby. How did you take that idea and then turn it into the business? What was the pivotal step or two? Obviously there's a lot involved there, but I think sometimes we get stuck on that bit. We have this idea and then we're like, oh, hang on, how do I create that? So what helped for you in that part?

00:12:21:11 - 00:12:51:23

Alison

Yeah, it's a great question. I probably didn't realise it at the time, but as I was building up this experience of being, a mother, reconciling all these different competing emotions, I was building up my life experience, too, and really trying different things. And so I, as part of doing the Mama rising certification with that knowledge and also just the life experience I had through mothering my two children, I decided to just start. So I just started to sort of put down some notes, reach out to, mentors like Amy to sort of bounce ideas off and just essentially, registered the business name and thought about it for a few months, spent way too long on a logo, you know, because those are the most important things. And then decided, let me just get out there and do it and back myself. And I think that's sometimes the hardest thing is actually backing ourselves because, having the courage to actually do something different. I mean, I have a complete corporate network of IT professionals who have very limited knowledge of matrescence or of any and, moving away from that brain was just, very overwhelming. But I had to trust in myself. And that's one of the pillars of, the program that I did with Amy's trust that you have, all that you need within you, to use that as a foundation to really back yourself and just start and everything else will fall into place.

00:14:05:07 - 00:14:13:16

Lucy

How have you found marketing this product. Like what channels have you used and what have you found challenging in that process?

00:14:13:16 - 00:14:31:11

Alison

To start with, I would say really trying to, differentiate myself from my competitors. There is a lot of, wellbeing boxes for months out there, and some of the boxes do have products for children, some don't. And so what did I need to do to actually, represent the fact that my box is not just about products, but also it's about delivering what most like this holistic care experience and the vision for my business is not just providing the products, but also providing, guided rituals, meditations. And one of the big things that I advocate, it's the love of mum is the concept of micro moments, which is really, taking those brief moments in the day to reset, to breathe, to reflect and just be. And I think that's something that a lot of mums find that they struggle with. So by actually encouraging people to, for mothers to find these moments of time to reset and recharge and giving them the products that they need to actually create those rituals, that was how I was going to start differentiating myself. And so by positioning that in through, Instagram and through my mama rising community, that's been the best way for me to sort of reach individuals who are looking to create those moments of time.

00:15:40:00 - 00:16:09:06

Lucy

Speaking of time, that's one of the last things that I wanted to cover is in terms of. So we created this season of the podcast to really deep dive into the how of running a business with a family, or even getting from the stage of considering when you do have caring responsibilities. So can you take us? If you don't mind a little sneak peek into the back of your world, how you run things in terms of time around home with your children, with your partner? What's them kind of hacks or processes that you use to keep things flowing the way that you want them to flow?

00:16:17:16 - 00:16:38:10

Alison

I think the first thing I do is I rely on my lists. It's must be something that I learned from my parents. But, you know, and I hear it all the time. I'm a big fan of Mel Robbins, and it's almost like the brain dump, you know? So it's just getting it out of your head and on paper and on the big person of just getting a white piece of paper. I love just a white piece of paper and I just map it all out. Personal, family, business. And, you know, that's kind of just gets out of my head and onto paper. My husband and I, we definitely tag team. So he works in digital marketing. He's got a busy job, but when he can, he's there for the kids. And if I need to do a meeting or do something with the business, pack some orders, he'll just step in and help. And support the kids. And we sort of just help each other in that way. And if we do need some specific support in a specific time, we definitely use our calendars. So we look at time in each other's calendars to say, hey, I need the support at this time. And then we know that, the other person is needed

00:17:24:17 - 00:17:45:01

Lucy

That's great. I love that. I also I'm a big fan of the big piece of white paper. I actually just invested in a massive whiteboard for my kitchen, so I can have that even on a much bigger scale. But the challenge with that is keeping my little eight year old hands off the whiteboard markers and messing up on my list. But I totally appreciate that. The white space and just writing it all down. Thank you so much for sharing all of that, Alison. It's been such a delight to speak with you and your boxes are just beautiful. I was having a look on your website the other day, to purchase a gift for an event that we're running in a few weeks time, so I encourage everyone to check it out. For love of mum, there's something at varying price points and be such a beautiful gift. To receive just something for you as you've so beautifully said. Is there anything else that you think's important?

00:18:20:23 - 00:18:23:16

Alison

I wanted just to add that, as part of my, process of building up my business, what I realised is that women, especially mothers, I should say, are really looking for more confidence in themselves that they actually are the perfect mother for their child. That's something that a lot of women grapple with. It's almost like, how do I do everything? And so I, I still remember the day that my daughter was born and we were leaving the hospital, and the midwife says to me, you've got this. And I remember feeling, I do not have this at all. And so I've taken that phase of my life and I've tried to create, affirmation cards that are now part of the boxes and part of my product suite, for the Love Of Mum.

And they're just really statements like, I'm stronger than I believe, or I’m stronger than I think I am, just to kind of help people feel and navigate their way through tough moments. And so that's the way that I'm channeling my mama rising and my matrescence training coaching, is it's not the traditional way where I'm actually going out and looking for clients, but more integrating the learnings and the practices into the product offerings as part of the box. And each box also has QR codes for digital content. And so the other aspect of the box is to create almost like a virtual village, connecting professionals who support mothers with the purchaser of the box, so the customer to help them get, access to, rituals and meditations that compliment the products. So it's it's actually, an, an evolution of the business over the last few months to bring all of those different aspects together to honour the different various components of a woman's mothering experience.

00:20:17:15 - 00:20:42:03

Lucy

Such and such a unique and, like, really special idea. And you can really hear through this conversation how impacted you've been through that beautiful teaching of matrescence and Amy's course. Thank you so much for coming on today, Alison, and sharing all of that. It's a delight to have you in this community. You're always amenable to everything we want to do with you. So we're very, very grateful for that. And we hope to see you at some event soon. But thank you for sharing your story.

00:20:49:12 - 00:20:52:01

Alison

Thank you, Lucy. I love being here. Thank you so much.

00:20:55:09 - 00:21:10:19

Carrie

Thanks for listening to today's episode. Don't forget to subscribe via Spotify or Apple Podcast. Mums and Co is a network helping business learning women to start, connect and grow. Join us today at mumsandco.com.au

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